LIFE OF PAINLESS PAIN

Deserted by everyone, I felt a shivering cold beneath my spine that shook the very existence of my life. As if I could ask for a fortune that could tremble my pain by resurrecting my dead soul which is deprived of love, company and feelings.

HOPE is not a bad thing but depends on the factor, how you confront it. A lot of hope is bad as the same goes for a diminutive one. As being an introvert hope is the only thing I can rely on, which acts both as a friend and a foe for me. Well depression leads to hope which vanquishes both reality and your ability to think and react. It overwhelms the very existence of life.

All I wish for is salvation from my phantasm life by any means, as specificity is no more a part of me. Tired of the desires and anticipations I have been engraving in my mind, hoping them to turn into reality someday. After being thrashed and torn up by the miseries of life I ended up living a dejected life, as if it seems to be the only way to cheer up for being born as a human being. Leading a solitary life is not too tough, though the real pain that grasps you is when you are reminded of your piteous life.

Often the harsh circumstances of life, pressurizes me to think over the harmony of life which is just a dreadful curiosity for me. As my mind lingers around my self-made delusion world, I feel alleviated as if I have lost a burden out of my heart. After carefully thinking of it, I guess that’s the best part of me or I suppose that’s the very definition of my existence.

Now here is what an exemplary of mind-jumble would I like to call :
There’s the girl, the one closest to my heart and soul, a sign of life left in me till the last ounce. Who is she to me? The question I have been asking myself for the past few years. Is she the one I had been longing for my whole life or just some random girl to whom I was attracted because of her cute and innocent face. But how to explain the pain that surges in my heart the instant I recall her face.  Might be a sign I was waiting for my whole life or a dreadful izanami cast upon me.


Location: National Institute of Technology Rourkela, National Institute of Technology, Sector 1, Rourkela, Odisha 769008, India

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